Saturday, October 31, 2009

Exile 2.1

17 OCT

All the sudden, out of thin air, this ‘thing’ came across my mind. Or it’s from the radio. Never mind, it doesn’t matter. So it came across my mind that ‘your closest friend is you bitterest foe’. I don’t even know why it came across my mind…

Let’s see why is that shall we...

Your closest friend will understand you better than, maybe, even your blood ties. I don’t about Others, but I have the habit of NOT telling my problems to anybody except my friends. I don’t even know why I acted like that. Maybe I don’t to worry them. Maybe I don’t know how to say it out loud. A lot of possibilities…

Now back to the ‘theory’. Not mine OK, we have known for a long time only we don’t it’s ‘existence’ until the ‘betrayal’ has happened.

These people will not only know your past, if they are observant enough, they will also know your nature, personality, how you think, how you act and how you react to certain things. I know this because I had saw, experience and done these things before. > ]

Before I continue, I must tell you it’s still never too late to close this window. I won’t blame you if you start thinking I’m a psycho or a person who has lost their mind or something. It’s just who I am…


I saw

Since I stopped being a Librarian, I start to ‘see’ things in a different point-of view. Adding up with all the books I’ve read, I seem to have developed a ‘sight’ to see and understand the things they, the people around me, do.

Sometime things are not as simple as the action is and sometime complicated actions just have a simple meaning behind. I can’t explain how, but I just know bits of the person from the things they say and do.

So, when things happened, I’m not as surprised as expected to be. This is because since I’ve nothing to do in class after I resigned from being a Librarian, I observe the people around me and do what the psychiatrist will say as ‘profiling’ them.

Isn’t that just creepy. ) I know, sometimes I also got creep-ed out by my own behavior as well. Lol. But that’s how SOMETIMES I see people. People are not only just humans but also as ‘books’ of different ‘subjects’ for me to ‘study’.

I experience

Who hasn’t experienced betrayal before? Ok, fine. MAYBE just maybe a few, but these as what I called The Lucky Ones are very rare. As rare as seeing an elephant on the highway. It exists but very hard to be found.

I, from what my experience can tell me, my most fatal weakness is being loyal. Seriously! I’m not complicating myself!

And my short ‘betrayal’ story is, (I’ll keep the details to myself) I had once trusted a person. I forgot the name or when or how but I remember experiencing it. I trusted him so much that I let my defense down and I pour out my deepest secrets to him. That’s before I become a psycho. Well, as the mountaineers says: ‘expect the unexpected’. He betrayed me to my Nemesis. Which I also forgot the name. After the incident, I was always on my guard never trust the person fully until I’m 300% sure. But on the happy note, once I trusted them, I’ll be as loyal as Japanese soldier to Japan until they severe the ‘bond’ first. The ‘bonding’ story is another topic which I’ll type another time.

That’s what I found out by my own. Here’s an advice: ‘It’s better know yourself better than other people know you’, because if other people know you better than yourself, you are vulnerable to the people who has plan for you. Always keep one hand to your gun until you can trust them fully.

I done

(Once again) Who hasn’t betrayed Others before? Ok, fine. MAYBE and just maybe and blah, blah, blah.

Yes, I hear and now confess that I betray people before. Only and only when They themselves doesn’t deserve to be trusted. The most obvious example is No. 5. (Inner circle language) He is a brilliant person until he demoted himself so low until nothing more than a slave to The 7 Asses. (The 7 Asses part is my own language. =P) Since he is nothing more than that, I feel no regret to betray him to the Others for he no longer deserves my trust.

Yes, I know I sound arrogant and evil this part but that’s what I think about him and my action towards him.

Now, Readers, you know me more! But as I mentioned above, I won’t divulge everything. So that’s that for the understanding I part.

So back to the very main topic: ‘your closest friend is you bitterest foe’.

After reading what I had saw, experienced and done, you can see, if you can, the very root of all these Happenings and this ‘theory’ is Trust.

Trust, as Fragile as a Glass and as Hard to Gain as a Ruby.

Once the Bond of Trust between Friends is broken, a new Bond of Foe will appear or all bondage will be severed forever. If the Second happened, Yippee you. But if the First happened, you better start prepare yourself for the worst mental assault you ever meet.

In conclusion, XD, I love this part,

Value the Jewel you have now.
For a Lost Jewel may be found after a series of hard work and time
For it also be turned as a Weapon against you.


e said...

your calling me an ass or are you saying the other 7 because there are 8 of us you know

Titus said...

Dun b so sensitive... The 7 Asses r not ppl.